All of this! I try not to use 'shoulds' 'musts' etc. (unless it's like - you shouldn't be a bigotted a-hole, or, you shouldn't touch a hot stove, then I reckon it's OK to say it! Lol,) because I know how much my Anxiety can latch onto those little words, even when I know the advice isn't something that will work for me. And I honestly don't want to be responsible for having that affect on other people.